Friday, February 10, 2006

Her hair was blunt cut...

I am looking for a single adult female to destroy the remains of my self worth (easy job, the ex-gf didn't leave much). My ideal woman is female.

About me: I am 27, single, Japanese, annoying, 5'6" and sort of skinny, but I love to not exercise and hope to become a medium sized fatty in my twilight years. I smoke, drink, do a healthy amount of drugs and have yet to be convicted of a felony (give me time though, I'm young).

I have many cheap pickup lines to try out on the (un)fortunate woman of my dreams. Chief among them being "Everyone needs a little Japanese (points to self) in them" and the always unsuccessful "No really, I'm not that drunk."

Hmm.. what else? My friends say my taste in music sucks so I won't even bring that up here. I'm bad at math (they're going to revoke my asian membership soon), my parents don't like me, and I was once a little fascist in shorts (i.e. a boy scout).

As for references, I've been told by many women that I would make an excellent ex-boyfriend and that yes, they would think about sleeping with me if I was the last man on the planet. and there were no sex toys available. or animals.

I shall leave you with a quote from a friend:
"Ladies, boost your self esteem by hanging out with someone obviously inferior."

22 Comments:

Blogger RightWing said...

/comfort

Saturday, February 11, 2006 10:56:00 AM  
Blogger Eva Luna said...

;-)) Kisses of a mad woman

Saturday, February 11, 2006 12:11:00 PM  
Blogger Jeseppi Trade Wildfeather said...

Absolutely charming new site. I am going to sindicate you to my Monster Blog site I can watch where you go.


Best regarads,

Wildfeather

Saturday, February 11, 2006 4:31:00 PM  
Blogger Unknown said...

I love this place.. This one was extremely hilarious!

Monday, February 13, 2006 8:45:00 PM  
Blogger Miz K said...

LMAO!!!! :) Soo funny!

Tuesday, February 14, 2006 9:08:00 AM  
Blogger M said...

Hang in there killer, one is bound to come along that likes you for what you are. hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahah, sorry I try to believe that myself.

Tuesday, February 14, 2006 3:37:00 PM  
Blogger Lindsay said...

Oh, congrats. I've bookmarked you.

Tuesday, February 14, 2006 3:50:00 PM  
Blogger Lisa Marie said...

well, you've made me laugh once again...good luck in finding that special someone to laugh at all your jokes and funny ways of being.

Tuesday, February 14, 2006 4:16:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

i tagged you!

dat aside, interesting site this is. you've got urself a fan! ;p

Tuesday, February 14, 2006 8:23:00 PM  
Blogger Donna~K said...

LMBO! I had to add you to my 'friends' list so I can come back here often!! Hope you don't mind.

Wednesday, February 15, 2006 3:31:00 PM  
Blogger Tigre said...

I don't like how shallow many women have become these days. That's why guys get depressed, and guys aren't suppose to get depressed darnit.

Wednesday, February 15, 2006 3:32:00 PM  
Blogger zeo said...

If you are in London I'd like to meet up :)

Wednesday, February 15, 2006 4:52:00 PM  
Blogger Anne Coleman said...

LOL! Well, if I weren't so deeply entrenched in marriage and mothering, I'd think about it :)

Great blog!

Thursday, February 16, 2006 1:33:00 PM  
Blogger daveyogi said...

yeah... like the way you are going with this blog!!

Thursday, February 16, 2006 2:15:00 PM  
Blogger E. Worthington, Editor said...

Perhaps you should provide some small amount of information about your location? I'd be happy to recommend some young ladies of interest, who have low self-esteem and could use the boost, but have no way to introduce them.

Enjoyed reading your posts, thanks for the entertainment.

Thursday, February 16, 2006 7:21:00 PM  
Blogger VGimlet said...

You'll do okay. :D Women love guys with a sense of humor.
I married a guy like that, after I got over my bad boy and jock phases.
Great blog.

Sunday, February 19, 2006 9:56:00 PM  
Blogger One Wink at a Time said...

Very, very funny :-))))))))))))

Monday, February 20, 2006 5:57:00 AM  
Blogger Krista said...

really funny.

Tuesday, February 21, 2006 3:57:00 PM  
Blogger Knitty Yas said...

haha.. hahahah... hahahahahahaha!!! and yet... kinda sad man... geez. your hilarious which means your probably this amazing wonderful human being who is wanted by all around you... im sorry i live in a dream world. :p

hahahaha!!
word verification of the day: efdwkegn ~~ what the hell kinda language is that?

Wednesday, February 22, 2006 9:57:00 PM  
Blogger P-Zan Leong said...

Unfortunately, I have someone else in mind.. but I would be glad to keep you company.

Thanks for making me smile. :)

Thursday, February 23, 2006 7:18:00 AM  
Blogger *quiet* said...

LOL!

This guy is a definite no no in my life! Well... unless he's just crapping xD

Thursday, February 23, 2006 7:58:00 AM  
Blogger Kait said...

heheh just pressed the next blog button to find quality, how delightful!

Wednesday, March 01, 2006 5:43:00 PM  

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